Month: September 2012

70 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

Have you ever wondered “what is the secret to a long and happy marriage?”

I still find myself wondering this from time to time, particularly during our times of struggle. How are some couples more in love with one another? What is their advice for a happy marriage? Is it just luck or is there really a trick to creating a happy and long-lasting marriage?

After loosing my Grandmother this morning I decided to blog about her, she is truly amazing in so many ways and has set the bar for all of us. A genuinely loving person beautiful inside and out. Went to chuch regularly and took in anyone. Her door was always open and as were her arms. She was strong lady, and always was fully of cheer, smiles and never spoke bad about anyone ever. A true angel! Coming from a huge Italian family she was the center to all, and touched all of those who knew her. She taught me so much, and will truly be missed. I am happy to say she is in a better place. Shining from the heavens above she is now with the rest of my family who has passed. I know that I don’t have all of the answers. But I will always remember everything she showed me. Her house always smelt of food, I have so many memories with her and my Italian family, whether it was an arm wrestling match, playing with my 20+cousins running around in her house, going on road trips, having annual family reunions, playing dress up with her clothes and wigs, putting on talent shows, playing a thousand KISSES – a game she made up, or just spending every holiday with her. Our family was so fortunate to be blessed with such a tight knit family foundation. I thank god everyday, and never take anything I have or anyone I know for granted. We are all her for a reason, and I was soon to realize mine.

I look up to her in so many ways! Her marriage was always strong, and she loves like no one has ever loved. She had a one of a kind marriage and I hope I can have the same one day. These are a few tips she has shared with me over the years. I am happy to share them with you.

Never assume.

Compliment more than you criticize.

For each time you vent about your husband/wife to your friends, tell three positive stories.

Remember that it is ok to do things differently (e.g. there is more than one way to peel a potato or fold the laundry).

Always make time for the two of you.

Marry someone that you enjoy listening and talking to.

Remember that marriage is sometimes a bed of roses and sometimes there are thorns.

Remember that the best gift that you can give your children is to love their mother/father.

Be fair! Split the housework, spending money, etc evenly, or as much as you can. This way you are never resentful of your partners contributions (or lack of) or expenditures.

Never go to bed angry.

Remember that people do fight. It’s how you do it that matters. Sometimes fighting is ok, just means you really LOVE that person.

Before starting an argument, consider if it’s really worth it.

Agree to disagree.

Never, ever mention the “D” word (divorce), ever.

Respect each other’s privacy. HAVE TRUST

Remember that “love is like childhood. You need to learn to share.”

Marriage is not 50/50, it’s two people giving 100/100 all of the time.

Surprise each other now and then.

Have date night!

Never pass up an opportunity to say “I love you”.

Hold hands.

Hug & kiss every day (several times a day actually!).

Always believe that you got better than you deserved.

Be quick to say “I’m sorry”. Its ok to be wrong, always apologize even if you know you are right ?

Love isn’t always a feeling, it’s a decision.

Hang in there. Know it’s worth it.

Play nice, play often, love much.

Never air your dirty laundry as a couple in public.

Never keep secrets from each other. For that is your soulmate and best friend.

Be each other’s champion. No matter what, take your husband or wife’s side first!

Communication is the key!

Always respect each other.

Never underestimate the power of a good belly-laugh and don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself.

It’s the little things that matter most.

Never use the words ‘Always’ and ‘Never’ in a fight.

It’s ok to argue, but never use curse words to express your anger.

Never compare your marriage to others. What you see on the outside is not always what it is on the inside.

AND LOVE WITH ALL YOUR HEART